Tuesday 31 July 2007

When Rambo cries…

I’m currently in Angola. For the people who suck at geography, it is on the West coast of Africa. It is a jungle out there and this somehow reminded me of Rambo (part 2 to be exact).

You see, most companies firmly believe that Rambo is employee number … (fill in your employee number). When the war is raging, battles are brutal and throwing money at the problem is not solving it, then they turn to the ultimate weapon in any company’s arsenal. They turn to Rambo. We all know that: “No man, no law, no war can stop him”. And even passport control at a foreign company can’t say no to him.

So why would you want to send Rambo? We’ll apart from being fearless, violent and built like a condom full of walnuts, he is also stupid. Sure there is a challenge, sure you are the best man for the job, sure there is a lot of money you can make from the trip - but they don’t mention everything. You are also the world’s biggest dodo! Why waste money on having a full team of people doing a job, when they can send one fool to take the beating on behalf of the company for not having the before mentioned team.

Now being stuck here in a country with only radio communication to base station and getting beaten to a pulp by clients isn’t the only frustration I have. To sweeten the deal my nemesis is also part of the equation. Yes, you got it – the Snake Oil Salesman is also in the mix!

Now since the Snake Oil Salesman’s posse is responsible for most of the pain I suffer, I need to share this little gem. I managed to convey the pain and suffering I’m currently experiencing to the enemy. The reply I got almost brought a tear to my eye. To quote: “That’s what I thought, and I’m relieved. The problem has been resolved. Now the discussion needs to happen around any financial issues that may surround it.”

So to summarise it all, Rambo has been sent to a foreign country to fight a war that was induced by the Snake Oil Salesman and his posse and to win the war, Rambo’s company must throw more money at the problem, negating the whole effect of sending Rambo in the first place. No wonder they poor guy fights with knives! Rattatatat! Rattatatat! Ka-Boom

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